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Is There Life Outside Writing?

Beyond the Writing LifeThey say the definition of insanity is repeating the same action while expecting different results, “they” being anonymous possibly to avoid the consequences of making such a lucid statement. It’s far too easy to accept an easily-consumed life doused with equal parts of wishes, hope, and lethargy. Tweet this! This can apply to every avenue of living, not just the writing life. Sometimes, even, we let writing get in the way of living. That happens once in a while for most of us, usually for reasons over which we have little or no control. At such times, maintaining a sense of humor is the way to make it through.

When writing crowds out the rest of life on a regular basis, it becomes a god demanding to be served at all costs. Historically, service to an idol could involve sacrificial offerings, sometimes of human lives. Reasons for worshiping touched on fear, reverence, and greed. Rewards included affirmation, a sense of belonging, and advancement. How close to these reasons and rewards does writing take us? It’s one thing to respect myself as a writer and polish my craft until it shines. It’s another to slavishly devote myself to writing as a grind that excludes all else. Having said this, I must also state that forces within the world of publishing can and do place super-human expectations on writers. That’s no excuse, though. We teach others how to treat us.

Attaining balance is key, and that requires us inevitably to disappoint the unrealistic expectations of others. Tweet this! As a reality that doesn’t sit well with me, but I’ve come to embrace it. If I didn’t, I’d reach the finish line having run the wrong race. I don’t miss deadlines or renege on promises but do give greater consideration to the cost of commitments before I make them

I’d like to hike across England, take up bicycling, raise my own vegetables, and spend more quality time with family and friends. My dreams won’t happen if I don’t give them time and consideration. Tweet this! Some put together bucket lists of things they want to accomplish or experience in their lives. That’s not a bad idea provided they take time to pull achievable goals from their dreams. Setting, scheduling, and attaining goals requires time and attention, but it’s worth it to live with passion.

How about you? Can you name other dreams into which you should breathe life?

Related Posts

The Perils of a Big Imagination (Or How to Stay on the Right Path)

7 Ways to Manage Time Stress (My Crunch-Time Cheat Sheet)

The Writing Life: This Video Could Just Change You

©2013 by Janalyn Voigt
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When Discouragement Calls Your Name

PennySome things make life as a writer worthwhile despite the struggles. You win a contest, find an agent and land a contract. You launch your book with parties, signings and interviews – all with you, the author, at center. You’re sought after as a speaker. People remember your name. You begin to feel like someone who won a coin toss.

But sometimes, just when you grow comfortable, the coin flips. You can’t sell your next proposal, your relationship with your agent takes a nosedive or a contract falls through.  Someone else gets that speaking engagement or a prominent reviewer shreds your book. It’s easy at such moments to want to chuck it all.

Don’t.

It’s not my intent to make light of your pain. Discouragement hurts. But these low points provide the opportunity to stretch and grow. If you lose faith in yourself, how will anyone else believe in you? Don’t look to others for validation and permission. Others will most often tell you what you can’t do. Don’t listen to the voice of discouragement and, whatever you do, don’t join in.

Whichever way the coin tosses, believe in yourself.

©2013 by Janalyn Voigt
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Time Management for Writers: Making Time to Write

Grandfather ClockNature abhors a vacuum, or so they say. I find this to be especially true after I clean a garden bed. Weeds sprout, mature, and seed in record time. If I don’t keep ahead of these intruders, visitors who traverse the walkway to my door may emerge with tales of jungle adventures.

This phenomenon happens with time, too. Retirees can attest to how quickly their schedules fill. Authors who stay home to write full-time soon discover that unless they guard their time, other activities soon crowd their writing time.

Really, that’s true for all writers. Clear time to write and watch the weedlings take hold. It takes determination, discipline, and something old-timers called sheer cussedness to take back your writing time. It can be done.

One word of caution: it can take a while to clear an overgrown garden. If weeds have strangled out your time, it may take a little time to free your schedule. Let’s take a look at some potential weeds.

Family Expectations

Let me first say that family relationships belong near the top of your priority list. I don’t advocate compromising their position. Often we need to give them more, rather than less, of ourselves. Having said that, sometimes family members can sometimes expect more from us than they should. It’s human nature to want others to do for us what we should do for ourselves. Setting healthy boundaries in all relationships is important. Understanding motivations can help you deal with unrealistic expectations. A litmus test in deciding where to draw limits is whether benefiting your family member retards that person’s personal growth. There are times to sacrifice your needs for others, but your needs should count as well.

My parents raised me with old-fashioned manners. Because we served guests first and best, I developed the habit of putting others before myself. While that may seem admirable, if all of us did this, no one would ever go first. This came home to me in the years I commuted by ferry from Bainbridge Island to work in a Seattle skyscraper. As the ferry neared the dock, the crowd gathered and, at the signal to disembark, funneled onto the narrow gangplank. When I first started commuting, I held back as others shoved in front of me. I soon learned that always letting others go first would make me late to work. I had to find a balance between letting others step in front of me and taking my own turn.

Belongings

Owning things takes a lot out of us. They require we keep track of them, pick them up, clean them, and remember where they are. Even getting rid of them takes energy. When it comes to personal belongings, less is more. That value is not held by the culture in which we live, so living by it will set you apart as different. If you can manage not to mind that, you’re ahead. Not to be a hypocrite in this, I must confess that I live in a large home with far too much “stuff.” But then, perhaps that’s how I know. My family’s decluttering campaign is ongoing and aggressive because this particular weed is invasive.

I’ve learned to clean house in the way professional cleaners do. Rather than cleaning room-by-room, they clean by categories: vacuuming, dusting, glass cleaning, scrubbing. I’ve found that copying this system saves time because it eliminates many time-consuming transitions between tasks. I’m working to set up a garden, vehicle, and household maintenance schedule with reminders in Google calendar so I don’t have to think about these things any more than necessary.

Entertainment

I love to read and to learn new things. While neither of those are bad, if I indulge them to excess (by spending too much time surfing the Internet, for example), they can erode my available time. I’ve had to relegate my reading, researching, and Internet surfing to set times. I’ve also given up several online games because I was giving them some of the time I should have been writing or spending with my family. I’ve also almost entirely given up television for similar reasons. Other areas I’ve cut back have been personal phone calls and shopping trips.

Having attended several funerals in the past few years has helped my perspective. Life is fleeting. I want mine to count. That doesn’t mean I don’t give myself breaks or recreation, but I do so within bounds. It’s important to ask yourself and your family the quality of life you’d like to live. Once you get a vision for that, it’s easy to make changes.

Social Networking

This is another area that is not inherently wrong but can be misused. Much networking takes place online these days, and while I won’t say those relationships aren’t real (I’ve met lots of writers I connect with online at conferences), they shouldn’t dominate. Writers are particularly vulnerable to overuse of social media. After all, we’re expected to network as part of our platforms. All of that is well and good, but it should still take its place behind our writing and occupy a small percentage of available time, overall. If, like me, you wind up with too many irons in the fire, don’t feel like you can’t downsize. To survive you must.

I’m learning to assign the time I’m willing to give to social networking and not to go beyond it. Pre-scheduling tweets and blog posts helps. Also, finding efficient extensions and applications is important. My recent guest post for Wordserve Watercooler goes into this: 10 Strategies to Keep You Afloat in the Treacherous Social Media Waters.

Keep in mind that, like a garden, your schedule needs regular tending to prevent weeds from regrowing from roots or sprouting from seeds. Cultivating your life’s soil will reap a harvest of writing time.

In this post, we’ve looked at four potential weeds, obstacles that can hinder us from making time to write. Do you have any thoughts on those I’ve identified? Can you name more?

©2013 by Janalyn Voigt
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Writing Life: Don’t Let the Internet Eat You Alive

Image of a Baboon with Mouth OpenRun!

There’s a beasty that never rests but waits to pounce on you at all hours of the night and day. This man- (and woman-) eater has a taste for flesh and will show no mercy as it rends its victims’ lives with disfiguring claw marks. The Internet can eat you whole if given half a chance.

Don’t give it that chance. Here are my 5 tips for taming the marauding beasty called the Internet:

  1. Develop a strategy. Draw up a written plan you place somewhere where you can refer to it often. Name your specific purposes for your involvement with the Internet. Define realistic goals so you won’t get sidetracked and walk into an ambush.
  2. Isolate it. Don’t sign up for every news letter you see or before you know it you’ll waste hours each day deleting emails. Don’t join a forum or other group until you’ve first counted the cost in terms of the time it will cost you.
  3. Back it into a corner. For many nowadays, myself included, ignoring the Internet altogether isn’t an option. But you can control where and when you turn on and tune in. Confine your Internet time within set time parameters, and then stick to them. Some people go so far as to set an alarm clock to help guide them.
  4. Lasso it. Make sure you have a grasp on what you need from your involvement with the Internet. If you don’t know what you’re doing when you put a rope around its neck, most beasties will either get away or come for you.
  5. Banish it to darkness. Author Jeff Vandermeer describes in BOOKLIFE how he actually had his wife hide the modem in a different place each morning. Only when he’d finished writing for the day  he call her and find out that day’s location. Do whatever it takes.
©2013 by Janalyn Voigt Subscribe to Live Write Breathe today!